


Through Life and Death

by pizZiCcato



Series: MuraHimu Week 2015 [6]
Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Character Death, Day 6 Entry, Dreams and Wishes, Gen, M/M, MuraHimu Week 2015, Name Changes, Past Lives, This is weird
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-31
Updated: 2015-10-31
Packaged: 2018-04-29 04:07:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5115242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pizZiCcato/pseuds/pizZiCcato
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Murasakibara dreams of his past life with Himuro.<br/>It wasn't a nice world.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Through Life and Death

**Author's Note:**

> Day 6: Pudding (10/31)
> 
> AU  
>  Dreams and wishes
> 
> Didn't get to put pudding in this one.

All his life, Murasakibara Atsushi has been dreaming.

That’s hardly anything worth mentioning to anyone else, but in Murasakibara’s case, it means everything.

Every night, Murasakibara dreams and those dreams always seem to be connected, but he rarely remembered anything other than bits and pieces here and there. But one thing remains constant, and Murasakibara can’t forget it no matter what.

In his dreams, there’s always a person who hides the left half of their face.

So, here’s a list of what Murasakibara knows about that person: That person has black hair, a very nice smile, and a fairly lithe built. Other than that, Murasakibara could only guess. He didn’t know who that person is, he didn’t know what that person’s name is, heck, he didn’t even know if it’s a man or a woman.

No matter how hard Murasakibara tried, he could never remember anything else about this person. When he woke up in the morning, he would always try to remember what his dream was about, but it was like trying to keep a handful of sand in your fist. The harder you try, the more it escapes.

It’s annoying. It’s really annoying because the image of that person won’t leave his mind and kept plaguing him, haunting him. It’s as if whoever that person is, they were trying to make him acknowledge their presence, which is stupid, because who the heck is that guy?

Because of this, Murasakibara could never focus on anything. Well, anything other than basketball. For whatever reason, when he’s playing basketball, his mind would clear and nothing would be able to disturb him until he stops playing. Because of this, basketball became one of the only constant things in his life.

Then he met Himuro Tatsuya.

He didn’t really know what he noticed first. Maybe it was the way Himuro hides the left half of his face. Maybe it was the way he smiles in greeting. Maybe it was the way Himuro played basketball like he’s dancing.

No matter which it was, Murasakibara felt like he’s finally found what has been missing all his life.

That night, all his dreams finally made sense.

***

_In their previous life, they had met on the battlefield, battling for opposite sides. Anyone could tell that they were stronger than pretty much everyone around them. They were the last men standing. Everyone else had retreated long ago._

_Murasakibara really wanted to go back with his troops, but the man standing before him didn’t look like he was retreating anytime soon, so of course someone had to stay back to make sure their hiding place stays hidden._

_“Aren’t you going to go back with everyone else?” Murasakibara said. He sincerely hoped that this man will just go to his own men, but it seemed luck isn’t on his side._

_The man standing in front of Murasakibara smiled. His smile doesn’t look fitting to be on a warrior’s face. In fact, his face doesn’t look fitting to be a warrior’s. He’s far too pretty to be one. Most warriors’ face would be scarred in some way, but this man’s face is unmarred. “I have to watch my comrades’ back for them,” he said. That voice, just like everything about this man, isn’t fitting for a warrior. No, it’s far too soft and smooth._

_Murasakibara stared. For some reason, he really wanted to crush this person. “What’s your name?”_

_A laugh came in response. “I’m sure you won’t care what my name is, seeing as you’re a well-known warrior yourself. The Purple Giant, yes? I’ve heard lots about you.”_

_Murasakibara raised his brows. So that’s what people decided to call him? Uncreative. They could’ve come up with something more original. “I don’t remember that ever being my name. Tell me yours.”_

_That man laughed again. “Of course that isn’t your name. How about this: if you win, I’ll tell you my name. If I win, you’ll tell me your real name. Deal?”_

_Murasakibara frowned. He really, really wanted to go back, maybe get something sweet, and just go to sleep early, but something about this man irked him. It made him restless._

_Slowly, Murasakibara unsheathed his sword. “I’m going to crush you, and then you’re going to tell me your name.”_

_That man smiled and readied his own sword. “We haven’t even started yet, don’t you think it’s a little early to say that?”_

_Without further ado, the two of them charged forward._

***

The following morning, for once, Murasakibara didn’t wake up with a hazy mind. No, his mind was the clearest it had ever been. He remembered every detail from that dream. He remembered how much blood was splattered on his armors and garbs. He remembered how many dead bodies were around him. He remembered the strange man he had encountered.

That strange man had certainly been Himuro. Murasakibara hadn’t doubted that, not even for a second. But the Himuro in his previous dreams, like the one in his present life, had half his face hidden behind his face, while the one from last night’s dream didn’t. He wondered what that’s about.

Even when he played basketball, he still couldn’t get the thought out of his head. Himuro almost got a shot into the basket Murasakibara was guarding. Thank god for his reflexes.

“Are you always this aloof when playing basketball, Murasakibara?” Himuro asked. His gaze was somewhat disapproving.

Murasakibara stared at Himuro unblinkingly. “Muro-chin,” he began, (Himuro’s eyes widened, clearly not expecting the strange nickname,) “Why do you hide your face?”

Himuro blinked. He exhaled a soft laugh, one hand subconsciously reaching up to fidget with his hair. “I wonder.”

“Hmm,” Murasakibara tilted his head, “I think Muro-chin is pretty.”

Himuro blinked again. For a moment, everything was silent. Murasakibara wasn’t sure if everyone else had stopped playing to stare at them or his brain had just blocked out everything else.

After what felt like ages, Himuro finally reacted. First he snorted, then he burst out into a fit of laughter, clutching his stomach from how hard he was laughing. Murasakibara raised his brows. He wasn’t really expecting that reaction.

It took a moment for Himuro to get his laughter under control. Even after that, he was still smiling. “Thank you, Atsushi. Do you mind if I call you that?”

Murasakibara shrugged. He didn’t mind. But his chest felt funny. Was it something he ate? Oh well, it’ll go away soon.

***

_Murasakibara had, of course, defeated that man._

_That pretty smile was still on his face – now marred by a large gash over his left eye – even as he coughed up blood. “You win,” he said, as if Murasakibara didn’t know that already._

_Murasakibara looked down on him. He flicked his blade to rid of the blood on it. “Tell me your name.”_

_That man wheezed, wincing as he tried to control his breathing. “Himuro,” he said, coughing again. More blood came forth. That was all he could manage before passing out._

_Murasakibara stared down at Himuro, unsure of what to do next. Slowly, he crouched down and pressed his fingers against Himuro’s neck. His pulse is weak._

_Murasakibara frowned as he removed his fingers. If it were any other day, he would’ve just left this man to die, but for whatever reason, he didn’t want Himuro to die just yet._

_Maybe it’s because he liked seeing Himuro fight. Himuro moved so beautifully and gracefully it looked like he was dancing. Maybe he was dancing and only swinging his sword around in hopes of hitting his enemies, Murasakibara thought fleetingly before he remembered how Himuro had aimed for his vital points so accurately. Definitely not just dancing, but that was probably what made it all the more beautiful._

_Murasakibara placed his arms under Himuro’s limp body and heaved him up. Himuro was unexpectedly light. But that might’ve been caused by the amount of blood he had lost. Maybe he shouldn’t have injured Himuro so heavily. He had to hurry if he wanted to save this guy’s life._

_Murasakibara started running, taking more care than he normally would so he doesn’t jostle Himuro too much. He ran into the woods nearby, seemingly with no clear direction, but Murasakibara knew where he was going._

_There were many physicians nearby, Murasakibara knew that, but there is only one he could trust. This physician is known by many to be the best in this age. If this physician can’t save Himuro, then nobody else could._

_A small house came into sight and Murasakibara sped up, still careful not to jostle Himuro. He stopped at the front door and started banging at it with his foot._

_The door was opened by a grumpy man who looked about ready to slice Murasakibara to ribbons. “What business could you possibly –“_

_Murasakibara pushed him aside and interrupted, “I need you to save this man. I don’t care what you say, you have to save him.” He turned around to look the physician in the eye. “Please,” he added as an afterthought._

_The physician scowled at him for a few seconds before caving in with a sigh. He waved his hand to tell Murasakibara to follow him. “Fine, bring him in. You better hurry, because from what I can see, he may not make it if we stall.”_

_Murasakibara obediently trailed after the physician. This man, Midorima, is someone Murasakibara had known since his young days, along with four other people. The others were Aomine, Kise, Akashi, and Kuroko. All of them were highly talented people in their chosen fields, even better than some of the adults. He hadn’t contacted the others in a long time, though._

_Midorima laid out some sheets on the floor, presumably where he wanted Murasakibara to put Himuro down. He didn’t waste any time to do so, anxiously moving away and pacing around when Midorima exited the room again._

_Midorima returned into the room carrying what must be his tools and equipment before promptly kicking Murasakibara out. “I need my space, Murasakibara. Stay outside until I let you in.”_

_Murasakibara didn’t argue as he exited the room and sat across the door, waiting patiently. For once, he wasn’t craving sweets._

***

Murasakibara stared at Himuro as they ran around the gymnasium during their warmups. They were running side-by-side, with Himuro to Murasakibara’s left and the upperclassmen some ways in front of them. “Muro-chin,” Murasakibara said, “Let me see your face.”

Himuro turned to Murasakibara with one raised eyebrow. Murasakibara caught a glimpse of pale skin when Himuro’s hair moves away from his face for a split second. “Why?”

“No reason,” Murasakibara said, facing forward again, “I’m just wondering.”

Himuro hummed in response and reached up to brush his hair out of his face. He then turned to Murasakibara. “Here.”

Murasakibara glanced to his left. Himuro’s face is unmarred, just like before they battled in their past life. Murasakibara turned his eyes away. “You really are pretty,” he commented offhandedly.

Himuro laughed. Murasakibara’s chest felt funny again. Maybe he should start watching what he eats.

***

_Midorima had taken longer than Murasakibara had anticipated. By the time he came out, Murasakibara was pacing around again, nervously fidgeting with his garbs and sword. He had wiped his sword clean three times already and doing it again would only make it dirtier._

_Midorima was staring at Murasakibara strangely as he spoke, “I’ve stopped the bleeding and cleaned his wounds, but his life is still in danger, so you should keep an eye on him. Murasakibara, who is he and what happened between you two?”_

_Murasakibara exhaled a short sigh at Midorima’s words. He ran his fingers through his hair absently. “He was with the men we were fighting. Everyone else from both our troops had retreated but he hadn’t so I had to stay back. He challenged me to a fight and I accepted it.” Murasakibara shrugged._

_Midorima frowned. “If he’s your enemy, why didn’t you just kill him? I know you’re perfectly capable of doing that, so why save him? If you’re planning to save him, why injure him so heavily?”_

_Why indeed. Murasakibara himself had no idea what he was thinking. When he was fighting Himuro, he didn’t even think of holding back because Himuro seemed capable of keeping up with him. Had he meant to kill Himuro back then? Murasakibara wasn’t sure._

_Midorima sighed at Murasakibara’s silence. “Whatever your reason might be, you’re keeping an eye on him because he’s your responsibility. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m retiring for the night.” Midorima walked past Murasakibara, briefly placing his hand on Murasakibara’s shoulder as he passed. But when Murasakibara looked back, Midorima just kept walking like he hadn’t done anything._

_Murasakibara stared at Midorima’s back until the other man disappeared. Then he walked into the room Midorima just left, where Himuro was lying on a futon and tucked under a thick blanket. Murasakibara sat on the floor next to the futon, quietly watching the rise and fall of Himuro’s chest. The left half of Himuro’s face was wrapped in a piece of white cloth, most probably to hide the gash over his left eye. There seemed to be many more similar strips of cloth wrapping his other wounds._

_Murasakibara didn’t realize he had inflicted so many wounds on Himuro. Maybe those were from his previous fights? That makes sense. But even like this, Himuro is still pretty. It makes Murasakibara wonder what made this man become a warrior._

_Himuro’s finger twitched from where his hand lay on the blanket. Murasakibara tensed. What was he supposed to do when Himuro woke up? Should he call Midorima?_

_Himuro stirred, wincing slightly. A moment later, his right eye opened and he immediately went alert, good eye flitting around the room in search of danger. His eye widened when he saw Murasakibara and he sat up a little too quickly, hissing in pain as he clutched his abdomen._

_“Relax, we’re not in the battlefield so I won’t hurt you,” Murasakibara said. He raised his hands to show that they were empty and he meant no harm._

_Himuro stared at him with eyes narrowed in pain and suspicion. “Where are we?”_

_“We’re at my friend’s place. He’s a physician and he treated your wounds while you were out cold. How are you feeling?” Murasakibara started fumbling with his fingers nervously as he spoke._

_Himuro felt his own body with his hands, occasionally wincing and hissing. “In pain,” he said, “But not dying.”_

_Murasakibara nodded. Then he remembered something, “You didn’t tell me your given name.”_

_Himuro looked at Murasakibara incredulously. “I just woke up after you slashed me half to death and that’s the first thing you ask me?”_

_Murasakibara shrugged. “On my defense, that’s not the first thing I asked. Didn’t I just ask how you’re feeling?”_

_Himuro stayed silent for a moment. “You’re unbelievable. But if you really want to know, it’s Ryuugetsu.”_

_Murasakibara nodded. “My name is Murasakibara Takeshi.”_

_Himuro raised his brow. “I didn’t manage to defeat you, so why are you telling me your name?”_

_Murasakibara shrugged again. “I don’t know, I just felt like it. You’re probably going to have to stay around for a while anyways, so not knowing each other’s names would be a bother.”_

_Himuro was silent again. After a long, almost awkward pause, he exhaled a short laugh, immediately wincing in pain and clutching his abdomen again. “I don’t really plan to stay around for long, but okay. I guess I’ll be leaving myself in your care, Takeshi. Do you mind if I call you that?” He smiled slightly through his pain._

_Murasakibara shrugged. His chest felt funny when Himuro said his name. Maybe he had gone too long without sweets. He’ll need to get some as soon as he can._

***

Isn’t it strange that the Himuro in his dream decided to leave himself in Murasakibara’s care just like that? Even if he was injured, he should’ve at least put up some fight, because no matter what he said, Murasakibara was still the one who injured him.

Then again, to outsiders, wouldn’t it be strange how Murasakibara attached himself to Himuro almost immediately after meeting in this life?

But Murasakibara remembered his past life, so he at least had a reason, though nobody can ever know that. Is it possible that the Himuro in his dreams had remembered his – no, their – past life? Had they also been together in the life before their last?

“What are you looking at, Atsushi?”

Murasakibara blinked. Ah, he was staring at Himuro again. “Nothing, Muro-chin.”

Himuro looked at him curiously, but didn’t say anything on the topic. “Come on, it’s our turn.”

Murasakibara obediently trailed after Himuro, but he was still thinking. Did his past self remember his own previous life? Did the past Himuro remember anything? Does this Himuro remember anything? Murasakibara wanted to ask, but he didn’t want to scare Himuro away, so he decided not to.

Thinking is tiring. Even if he thought his head off, Murasakibara may never find the answer, so he pushed his thoughts to the back of his head.

***

_“Takeshi,” Himuro called, but he wasn’t looking at Murasakibara, “Do you think it’s possible for us to fight together?”_

_Murasakibara stared at Himuro, trying to figure out what he’s thinking. From where he was sitting, he could only see the left side of Himuro’s face, which was hidden behind a curtain of hair. “It depends. Are you willing to leave your people? Because I’m not. It’s too much trouble.”_

_Himuro hummed in response. “I see. I was expecting that, but I still think it’s a shame. I have a feeling that we would’ve been really compatible.” He smiled slightly._

_Murasakibara pulled his knees to his chest and rested his chin on them. “Maybe when you get better, we can see if that’s true.”_

_Himuro turned to Murasakibara, eyebrows raised. “How exactly are we going to do that?”_

_Murasakibara shrugged. “We can always just go hunting, or if you want, we can find opponents to fight. We’ll think about that later.”_

_Himuro was silent. Then a smile spread on his face, the kind of smile that made the corner of his eye crinkle slightly. “I’ll look forward to that.”_

_Murasakibara’s chest felt funny again._

***

The others seemed to have noticed that Murasakibara trains harder than before. The upperclassmen would occasionally give him encouraging pats on the back and that should’ve made him happy, but nothing made Murasakibara as happy as Himuro’s small smiles did.

They seemed to have also noticed that Murasakibara plays better with Himuro on court. It’s a little embarrassing, but it can’t be denied. Murasakibara felt more motivated to play with Himuro nearby. He didn’t know if it’s the same for the smaller male, but maybe Himuro liked playing with him too. Why else would he put up with Murasakibara’s random whims?

“Atsushi, I’m going to Tokyo, do you want to come with me?”

Murasakibara blinked at Himuro. He stayed silent for a moment. “Why?”

Himuro shrugged. “I’ve returned to Japan for a while, but I still haven’t gone to Tokyo, so why not? Maybe we can get some sweets that can’t be found in Akita,” he said and smiled.

Murasakibara turned his eyes away. “Okay then,” he said. He’s going for the sweets, he tried to convince himself, but he can’t deny that he wouldn’t have thought to go to Tokyo if Himuro wasn’t with him.

***

_“Are you sure you should be moving around? You wouldn’t want to worsen your condition, would you?” Murasakibara said._

_Himuro, who was trying to walk himself out of the room, paused momentarily. He turned to Murasakibara. “I’m feeling much better already, Takeshi, don’t worry.” He smiled and proceeded with what he was doing._

_Murasakibara sighed at Himuro’s stubbornness. “Even if you say that, your wounds haven’t healed completely. Are you doing it on purpose so you can stay here longer?”_

_Himuro paused again. He flashed Murasakibara another smile. “Maybe I am. Who knows?”_

_Murasakibara groaned. “Come on, why are you so eager to leave anyways?”_

_“There’s something I have to do. Now help me, Takeshi.”_

_Murasakibara sighed again. It seemed like nothing could change Himuro’s mind, so Murasakibara moved to help him. “Where are we going?”_

_Murasakibara didn’t know if it was just his imagination, but something flickered in Himuro’s good eye. He was silent for a moment before saying, “We’re going to find my surrogate brother.”_

***

Murasakibara didn’t like Kagami Taiga.

He has weird eyebrows. He won’t leave Murasakibara alone. He also felt like Aomine before… that thing. Kuroko was there with him too. Yeah, he’s just like Aomine, though Murasakibara found Aomine a little less annoying.

But the thing he hated most about Kagami Taiga is the fact that Himuro seemed so attached to him.

As if the ring he’s always wearing isn’t enough proof, Himuro had been so dead-set on challenging Kagami. It irked Murasakibara.

“Muro-chin, who is that guy?” Murasakibara asked. They were changing out of their drenched clothes after leaving the streetball court.

Himuro stayed silent for a moment. Murasakibara didn’t miss his fingers fidgeting with that ring he always wears around his neck. “He’s my brother.”

***

_Himuro’s brother looked nothing like him._

_That man is large. Not as large as Murasakibara, but larger than Himuro. Murasakibara felt instant dislike for him. “I don’t like him.”_

_Himuro laughed. “You don’t really have to. I’m planning to fight him in the near future.”_

_Murasakibara glanced at him. “Why?”_

_Himuro’s mouth pressed into a thin line. “We have some unsettled business.”_

_Murasakibara faced forward again, to Himuro’s brother who was still unaware of their presence. “I don’t know if I want to get involved in whatever this thing is.”_

_Himuro smiled, just a tiny quirk of his lips. “That’s fine. But I’d like it if you were by my side.”_

_Murasakibara sighed and turned to Himuro. “Why exactly are you so hung up on me? I don’t get it.”_

_Himuro closed his eyes, as if praying. “I wonder.”_

***

Kagami had beat Aomine.

Murasakibara didn’t think Aomine would ever lose to anyone, especially to someone who isn’t a Miracle, but Kagami might have been a Miracle himself for various reasons. Still, it’s not like Aomine to lose.

Murasakibara wanted to crush Kagami.

At least he didn’t have to worry about Himuro, because that guy seemed even more intent on beating Kagami. Murasakibara had never seen Himuro train that hard for anything.

“Muro-chin, what happened between you two?”

Himuro almost missed his shot, but it went into the ring smoothly. Himuro kept his eyes away from Murasakibara when he answered, “You won’t understand, Atsushi. People like you never will.”

Murasakibara pretended not to notice Himuro’s pain as he said that.

***

_“I’m leaving tomorrow night.” Himuro said._

_“To fight you brother?” Murasakibara asked._

_Himuro made a small sound in confirmation. “Yes. Do you want to come with me?”_

_Murasakibara scowled without looking at Himuro. “No. It’s your problem, so you should solve it yourself.”_

_Himuro made another sound. “Is that so… Ah, I should thank you for your hospitality. Tell your friend that too. I won’t disturb you again after this.”_

_Murasakibara glanced at Himuro. “You haven’t recovered.”_

_Himuro kept his eyes away from Murasakibara. “I’m well aware.”_

_Murasakibara turned to face Himuro fully. “He’s not an easy opponent.”_

_Himuro still didn’t meet Murasakibara’s eyes. “I’m well aware.”_

_Murasakibara gave Himuro a hard look. “Are you sure that you can fight him in your current condition? What if you lose?”_

_Himuro was silent for a moment. Then, “I won’t lose. Trust me, Takeshi.” Himuro smiled. It’s still the prettiest thing Murasakibara has ever seen._

_Murasakibara decided to trust Himuro._

***

Himuro punched him.

Himuro cried.

Himuro yelled at him.

All of that, because Murasakibara wanted to quit.

Really, nobody can stop Kagami anymore and they were going to lose either way, so why try so hard? When he pointed it out, the upperclassmen looked like they wanted to punch him, but none of them managed to do anything before Himuro did just that.

“You have what I desperately want, and you’re trying to throw the game,” was what Himuro had tearfully said.

Everyone was so stunned they couldn’t do anything. Murasakibara could only stare with wide eyes as Himuro’s tears splashed on his cheeks.

Somehow, Himuro managed something that resembled a smile. “You’re making me crazy with rage.”

That was when everything flashed in front of Murasakibara’s eyes.

The last chapter of their previous life.

Most probably also the reason why this Himuro is still so fixated on beating his brother.

All of it flashed in high speed like a sped-up movie. It looked more like a blur that Murasakibara had problem processing, but he saw the important parts and that’s all that mattered.

_Ah. I see now, Muro-chin._

Murasakibara blinked. He’s back to the present, with Himuro crying in his face.

“Get away from me, that’s so annoying.” How can someone be so fixated on something after one lifetime?

“Anyway, I can’t believe you’re crying.” Other people may not understand why one would cry for something they see as just a game, but Murasakibara knew better. Himuro may not consciously remember it, but his soul certainly remembered what had happened in the past.

“I sort of noticed, but I didn’t know you felt this strongly.” It’s all because of what had happened back then, is it?

“Actually, this is the first time I’ve been amazed by how much someone’s repulsed me.” _Muro-chin, how dare you._

_How can you tie me to you through two lifetimes?_

So Murasakibara changed his mind. He kept playing. He said it’s because he hated to lose, but it was more for Himuro.

He wanted Himuro to win.

He wanted to be the one to make Himuro win.

So he played harder than he had ever played in his life, but it’s still not enough. They still lost. Himuro still lost, even after all his hard work. All because Murasakibara couldn’t get that last shot.

“I’m quitting basketball,” Murasakibara said to Kiyoshi later, “I played until the end because Muro-chin was so desperate, but it wasn’t fun. It’s already boring enough a sport, there’s no reason to keep playing after I’ve lost.”

He said it like it’s no big deal, but losing really hurt. Murasakibara’s eyes were already burning with unshed tears, but it was Himuro’s next words that truly broke him.

“We’ll win next time, Atsushi.”

Those words meant so much more than they seem.

In his past life, Murasakibara wasn’t allowed to cry, so in this life, right at that moment, Murasakibara cried enough to make up for the unshed tears from the past, because he has the burden of two lifetimes on his shoulders.

***

_“You’re a liar.”_

_This is already the second time Murasakibara sees Himuro’s defeated form. But Himuro was still smiling, no matter how forced and pained it looked. “I’d never do that intentionally.”_

_“You said you were going to win,” Murasakibara said. He knelt next to Himuro and pulled him slightly off the ground, earning a pained wince._

_“He’d gotten stronger,” Himuro said. He winced again as Murasakibara pulled him closer to himself._

_“You said you were going to win,” Murasakibara said again. He patted Himuro’s body down to check for injuries. There were lots of them. Himuro is losing blood too quickly to be saved._

_Himuro hissed as Murasakibara kept prodding at his wounds. Was the pain in his eyes only from the wounds, or were they also from something else? “I did. I was planning to win.”_

_“But you lost.” Murasakibara poked at Himuro’s back. There seemed to be fewer wounds there, but they’re still there._

_Himuro was silent for a moment, during which Murasakibara concluded that even if he started running then, he still wouldn’t make it to Midorima’s place before Himuro dies of blood loss. Then, “It’s unfair.”_

_Murasakibara finally turned his eyes to Himuro’s face. Himuro was looking up at the sky, a trail of tears streaming down the right side of his face while the left half is still hidden behind his hair. “It’s unfair, Takeshi,” he said again._

_“The world is cruel.” Murasakibara had no reason to keep holding Himuro or even stay there, but he did both. “Of course it’s unfair. Sometimes, even trying your very best doesn’t make you win.”_

_Himuro let out a weak laugh that sounded so broken Murasakibara thought it would’ve been better if he started crying instead. “Those are some great words coming from you, Takeshi! What do you know about this world’s cruelty? You, one of the greatest warriors of this time, who can take on an army all by yourself! You, who is sought by every lord who has heard of your name! What do you know about this world’s cruelty?”_

_“Calm down, I don’t want you to die just yet.” Murasakibara said. But Himuro’s words stuck to him. Yeah… where did those words come from? Murasakibara himself certainly never thought that deep about this world before. Strange._

_Himuro turned his good eye to look at Murasakibara. “You don’t want me to die just yet? What could you possibly want from me? You don’t even know me, Takeshi. I don’t have anything to give you. Just leave me alone.”_

_Himuro moved to push Murasakibara away, but he didn’t budge. “I’m not leaving you alone. Now stop moving around, you’re going to bleed even faster.”_

_Himuro stopped struggling then, instead opting to give Murasakibara a sharp look. “What do you want now?”_

_Murasakibara stayed silent, because he didn’t know what he wanted. He just knew that he wanted to stay with Himuro longer._

_If he wanted that, shouldn’t he have come here with Himuro earlier?_

_Yeah, he should’ve come with Himuro. He knew that Himuro was in no condition to battle anyone, yet he let him go so easily. If he didn’t want to come with him, he should’ve at least held Himuro back._

_“You should’ve waited until you’ve healed before coming here,” Murasakibara said, “What’s so important that it can’t wait?”_

_Himuro was silent again. Murasakibara looked at his face to make sure that he’s still alive. After a moment, Himuro spoke, “Ten years ago today, I met my brother for the first time. I wanted to settle things with him before ten years had passed.”_

_Murasakibara scowled. “That’s so stupid. You’re going to die because of something so stupid.”_

_Himuro laughed, not the broken laugh from before, but still not a genuine laugh. “It’s stupid, isn’t it? But even knowing that, I still couldn’t let it go.” Himuro sighed. “I’m just that childish.”_

_Himuro took a deep, shaky breath that almost sounded like a sob. Murasakibara pulled him closer and rested his chin on Himuro’s head. “No, you’re not. I’d hate losing to someone who’s supposed to be inferior to me too.”_

_“Of course you do. Everyone does.” Himuro sighed heavily. “I wish I can beat him.”_

_Murasakibara opened his mouth, about to speak, but he hesitated. Himuro definitely noticed, but he didn’t say anything. After a moment, Murasakibara decided to just say it and be done with it. “Next time, I’ll fight with you.”_

_Himuro shifted in Murasakibara’s arms, but it wasn’t to escape his grip. Murasakibara let Himuro pull back slightly to meet his eyes._

_“You’re going to fight with me?” Himuro seemed surprised._

_Murasakibara nodded. He can’t trust himself to speak just yet._

_At first, Murasakibara was met with a look of disbelief. Then a slow smile spread on Himuro’s face, slowly growing until he was smiling so happily he was practically glowing._

_That’s definitely the most beautiful thing Murasakibara has ever seen._

_Himuro raised his hand and placed it on Murasakibara’s cheek. It was covered in blood, but Murasakibara could still feel the skin on Himuro’s palm. Contrary to his belief, it was quite rough and calloused._

_Murasakibara wrapped his own hand over Himuro’s. “Next time, I’ll fight with you. Then you won’t lose. I’ll make you win, I’ll definitely make you win.”_

_Himuro’s smile would’ve gotten wider if it’s possible, but seeing the way his eyes shone brighter is enough for Murasakibara. “Takeshi,” Himuro said, “We’ll win together. Next time… We’ll win together next time.”_

_Murasakibara nodded. He then leaned forward and placed his forehead against Himuro’s, still holding his hand to his own cheek. He closed his eyes and listened to Himuro’s increasingly pained breathing._

_He didn’t know how long they sat in silence, but Murasakibara didn’t move for a long time. He didn’t move even as he felt Himuro’s breathing slow impossibly, not even when he felt Himuro’s body go slack in his arms, not even when he felt the warmth leave Himuro’s body._

_As Murasakibara slowly loosened his grip on Himuro’s hand and let it drop on his chest, he opened his eyes to look at Himuro’s face. He looked so peaceful he might have been sleeping if it weren’t for the absence of breathing._

_Murasakibara brushed Himuro’s hair out of his face, fingers trembling slightly. He brought his face close to Himuro’s ear._

_“I’ll see you next time.”_

***

“Hey, Muro-chin.”

“What is it, Atsushi?”

Murasakibara hesitated. Himuro waited, patient as he always is.

Murasakibara set his jaw and spoke, “Next time, I’ll make you win.”

Himuro was silent for a moment, but when he spoke, Murasakibara didn’t have to look to see the smile that was definitely on Himuro’s face. “No, Atsushi, we’ll win together.”

As they walked side-by-side, arms brushing, Murasakibara felt the lightest he had ever felt in his whole life. He wondered if he’ll dream of his past life again after this.

_No,_ a small voice at the back of his head said, _From now on, we’ll dream of the future._

%MCEPASTEBIN%

**Author's Note:**

> So... I wrote this thing quite a while ago, but it never saw the light of day because I thought it's shit. Then I saw Day 6's themes and immediately thought of this.  
> I tried writing something else, but it failed fantastically so here you go.


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